How To Make New Year’s Resolutions That Will Actually Work

Now this article is certainly not to criticise anybody for their intentions or for trying their best.  But equally this article is also not going to be another one offering tips for 2025 that you’ve read a thousand times before, or that would take you 5 seconds to find on the internet with advice such as:

• Set Clear Goals:
• Break Goals into Smaller Tasks:
• Create a Vision Board:
• Develop a Routine:
• Stay Positive:
• Reward Yourself:
• Find an Accountability Partner:
• Reflect Regularly:
• Learn from Setbacks:
• Mix Things Up:
• Stay Healthy:
• Practice Mindfulness:
• Celebrate the New Year:

All of which is valid advice.

Yet why is it that for many people year after year, the above advice doesn’t work?

Why are we motivated for a week or two or even a day or two, but then the motivation passes and the ‘new year new me’, becomes a distant memory?

More importantly what can we do about it?

It starts with understanding 2 key elements:

1 – Understanding Yourself, & Be Kind

To you.  First of all, I must remind you that you are but a mere human being.  You will always have ups and downs and highs and lows, and that (I’m sure you’re very close), you are not perfect.  With that in mind, try and be nice to yourself about yourself.  Give yourself a pat on the back when things are going well and heading in the right direction.  Equally, try not to be too tough on yourself if you fall off the training and exercise wagon.

Take the lessons from the good and the indifferent and keep taking small steps forward.  Remember the saying that “there is no such thing as failure, only feedback”.

2 – Understand The Challenges

There are 3 key challenges we are faced with.

/ – There are many of us who don’t enjoy training & exercise – and often struggle to connect with the ‘rewards’ of training and exercise whilst we are participating in the moment, but also before heading to the gym.  When we are not connected to the rewards, it’s easy to replace training and exercise for something that our mind believes is far more rewarding.  That can include ticking off tasks from our task list that we tell ourselves are a “higher priority”, doing jobs we perceive have to be done “right now” or anything other reason to give yourself permission not to attend.  Achieving these important tasks gives us a blast of dopamine and we feel great for the very short term.  However, that’s soon replaced by feeling of guilt, self-loathing, and angst for our non-attendance.  As I always say – ‘short term pleasure = long term pain’.

// – We are busier than ever – trying to find the time to balance a family life, a career, running a home, and more.  Never mind finding time for ourselves.  In this fast paced and busy world, it’s not easy.

/// – Today’s solutions have become tomorrow’s problems – Modern day life is detraining an extremely crucial skill in pretty much all of us, and that is the ability to handle frustration.  We can purchase our latest gadget online fast; we can order food and have it delivered fast, and the world of technology means everything is instant and at the click of our fingers.  This however is not the case for your training and exercise results in the gym.  Your results take time, effort, and hard work.  Lasting change is something that will not happen overnight.

Putting all this together means it’s easy to forget our best intentions, or simply find something that is more important or more of a priority than training and exercise in the given moment, and then simply cancel.  The frustration from non-attendance builds, and before we know it the cycle of non-attendance continues, the negative feedback loop continues, and despite us not feeling too good in ourselves, the task at hand appears too great, and we quit.

But again, what can we do about it?

Because that’s enough of the doom and gloom (understanding all of this about yourself is a huge step forward in breaking this negative loop).

But also because I believe there is another solution.

And it’s a fairly simple one that will enable you to achieve everything you’ve ever wanted with your training and exercise goals.

And that is to search for a higher purpose.

By that I mean – to train for something that you perceive is more “important” than many of the things that take hold of your time each day.

I.E – a charity event.

Many charities have events that are linked to their fundraising.  So today, why not search online and sign up to raise some money for a charity that’s close to your heart?  Why not let 2024 be the year that you run your first 5k or 10k.  Or 2024 be the year that you cycle from Manchester to Blackpool or participate in any number of the other events that are out there in your local community.

I have seen first-hand the desire, drive, determination, commitment, and effort displayed by the participants each year in my annual charity event ‘Charity Boxing Nights’.  The participants have jobs, often have families, are busy and like many of us they don’t have much spare time.  I am sure there are also days when they are tired, don’t feel like it or are lacking in motivation.

But they have made a commitment.

Firstly, to themselves, as this commitment requires them getting super fit to compete and give themselves every chance of success.  The biproduct of their commitment is increased training and exercise sessions which will get them much closer to their overall goals.

But their commitment is to something much bigger and far greater than they are (in their mindset).

Their commitment is to the cause.

The charity they are competing for and raising money for.

And that overrides pretty much anything. Busy, tired, feeling achy or just don’t feel like it – it doesn’t matter as the cause is more important.

So much so that they don’t need to be motivated.

Instead, they are completely focused on what it is they must do, and they get it done.

I’d highly recommend you read the book ’Start With Why’ by Simon Sinek.  It’s an epic read and whilst some might say is for business goals, it can be adapted to any goals and targets in life (some good videos and talks are available online also).

To quote the book, our annual event gives our participants “their why”.

Because when they find their why, have connected with it, and then committed to it they can override fatigue or lack of motivation, and instead become relentless with their training and exercise.

The charity wins as you can raise some money (any amount is amazing no matter how big or small), and you will equally benefit by becoming the fittest, fastest, and strongest version of you.

I would encourage every one of you to explore having a higher purpose or your ‘why’ with your training and exercise in the new year. To consider participating in something that has deeper meaning to you.

When you do this, you can make a huge difference to others, as well as yourself.

MORE FROM BROOD:

Ashley James images by Tom Pitfield © BROOD Magazine

He’s never really expressed interest in dresses before but we’ve always let him openly explore whatever makes him happy regardless of what gender they have been traditionally assigned to: dolls, pushchairs, pink etc. I’ve always thought it was weird that dolls and pushchairs are considered “girly” given that it’s also modelling being a dad!

Anyway, I promised him he could have a dress and texted Tommy asking him to pick one up. He didn’t question it and was so enthusiastic to share Alf’s excitement! It made me so sad to think of all the generations of boys that aren’t allowed to be themselves. But on a deeper level – why do we discourage boys from having female role models and from “girly” things?

Anyway, it turns out Alf decided that dresses are not that comfortable – but I feel so happy that he gets to grow up with such a strong male role model in his dad that he does not try to force him into a box of masculinity!

How wonderful would the world be if we allowed our sons and daughters the space and freedom to be whoever they want to be. 

And we couldn’t agree more! Now onto the interview…

At what point in your career did you become a Mum and how did you find that transition? 

 “I became a mum right in the middle of lockdown really. So my pregnancy and lockdown were pretty much In Sync. So it was quite a weird time because obviously the TV studios sort of shut down and I was doing a lot of things on Zoom, and then of course I lost all my DJ gigs overnight with lockdown because there wasn’t any. So then when lockdown lifted and I had Alfie I had to kind of like find my feet again in like a double sense of the word. And I felt this huge pressure to go back to everything really quickly because I’d already not worked for over a year. So I did feel pressure on myself more than anything, I guess, but I wanted to be back DJing. I wanted to see people dancing again, I wanted to be able to do what I loved and also I think it really hit me when the lockdown was lifted that everyone else’s world kind of went back to normal, but I didn’t recognise my world anymore. So, yeah, I think the transition was really hard. 

So when I had Ada, one thing I was quite certain about – which I think people can be quite judgmental of –  is that I was going back to work straight away, and obviously I’m very lucky in this industry, that that can be accommodated. So Ada has been to the Ministry of Sound, she went to all my fashion brand DJ gigs, and she was there with Dyson headphones on when I was digging for Dyson. She came to Steph’s Packed lunch back when I was doing that up in Leeds. So we’d get the train together, and obviously the great thing about the Doona is that it’s so easy to transport her anywhere. We would stay in the Holiday Inn, doing the TV shows. So she came with me everywhere for the first six months and then after that, I had her in full-time childcare, which again lots of people are quite judgemental of, especially given that she was six months old. But I think there’s no such thing as Dad guilt, and we never shame Dad’s for going back to work and especially in this climate where not all Mum’s want to work, but a lot of Mums need to work. And actually, she was in the best place for her and I was in the best place for me and I really think it has made me a better mum because I get to do what I love and get to be a Mum as well.”

What do you think the hardest thing about being a working parent is, especially as your career is rapidly growing, and going from strength to strength? 

“I think there’s quite a cliche quote where it says something like, ‘You have to work as if you don’t have children and have children like you don’t have a job’, and It does feel like you’ve got two full time jobs that run side by side, but you’re not allowed to tell the other one about the other!  So you find yourself trying to show that, when you’re at work – you’re at work, and that role doesn’t care really if you’ve been up all night, or that your kids sick or, about any of the things that you’re facing, because even if they’re in childcare, like the work doesn’t stop! Even if that thinking, ‘Oh, I need to get them some new clothes’, or ‘I need to book their vaccinations’ – which you can only do during office hours –  so you know all that maternal mental load that you carry around is still there. And equally then when you’re at home, your kids don’t care if you’ve got any work to do. Obviously, a lot of my jobs are on Instagram, and if I have to post at a certain time and that happens to be bedtime, my kids don’t understand, I can’t say ‘Sorry Mum’s just got work quickly’, they want your full attention and of course, they deserve your full attention. So it’s trying to find that almost impossible balance within that juggle. And what I find really hard is I think there’s a lot more expectation on the Mums, like there’s an almost impossible expectation and pressure. For example, if I’m ever out, the first thing people will say is,  ‘Who’s looking after the kids?’ whereas no one would ever ask Tommy that, and actually he went away for work for a whole week to LA and not a single person asked him who had the kids. So I think, you know, I feel very lucky that I’m in a very 50/50 relationship in terms of our co-parenting, but I don’t think personally that it can never be 50/50 because societal expectation is all on the Mums and we judged mums that stay at home, we judge mums for going back to work, we judged mums really for anything, which is why I always say that you may as well find your own lane and feel comfortable and confident in that. And if that’s what you want to be a stay at home mum, then I take my hat off to you, because I think it’s the hardest thing in the world. I think stay at home Mums don’t get enough credit. But if you want to be a working Mum, or if you want to do both, whatever it is, I think as a society we need to hold Mums in much more esteem, and give them a bit of a break. 

Ashley James images by Tom Pitfield © BROOD Magazine

Do you think that’s why Mum’s feel so much ‘Mum guilt’ and is it something that you have experienced? 

“I’m going to say I actually don’t feel Mum guilt. I never feel mum guilt. And it’s funny because I think that’s always what people say when you are working, ‘Oh you must feel really guilty?’, but it’s like, well, no, I don’t because I get to do what I love and I get to be a mum. I know that if I was at home all the time with them, I would find it so overstimulating.

I could go into a talk at Parliament, I could go on live TV on This Morning and you know, talk about news topics that I only found out about 5 minutes before and I would find it all a lot easier than being at home all the time, especially with a three and a one year old, because I feel like they both love danger and want to kill themselves in separate places [she laughs] so I find out next to impossible. So I don’t feel guilty about pulling in resources and getting to go to work and as we’ve said there is no such thing as Dad guilt, so I don’t think we should have to feel guilty either.

Has there been anything in particular that you have found especially challenging?

“What I do find really hard though, is that, if you’re lucky, you get a year maternity leave, but I was self-employed so technically I was very lucky, but I didn’t get that maternity leave. And I mean I was lucky in the sense that I got to take Ada with me, but what I did find hard was that I ended up breastfeeding Alf for a year and Ada for 15 months, and I didn’t really have a plan with feeding, that’s just how it happened and that was the option that was easiest for me, Alf didn’t even take a bottle, but there is kind of this expectation that when you first have the baby, you sort of get six weeks where people are very kind to you and they kind of they know that you’re occupied, but then I feel like the patience runs out, people kind of expect you to be able to go out and to be able to do all the things that you were doing before. You kind of hear things like, ‘I hope you’re not going to be one of those Mums who only talks about their kids’ and I found myself when I was 8 months in with the perception that lots of other mums (who had given birth at a similar time to me), had got their normal life back because, they were able to share feeds or give the baby a bottle, therefore they can have babysitters and I did feel a real sense of frustration or loneliness and isolation that my body was still the source of food and it was really hard to navigate that. Obviously, retrospectively, you’re like, it’s just a year it doesn’t matter, but I feel like society doesn’t even give you that time and it doesn’t kind of have much empathy, because if you said it out loud you would just be met with well give them a bottle then, and obviously it’s not that simple. I don’t know, I just think feeding in general is such a sadly controversial thing no matter how you feed and I think it’s just a shame that we don’t support people no matter which way they choose to feed.”

Have you ever had what we call a BROOD moment where your career and parenthood collide?

“Yes, it was when Alf was a baby, I was a new mum and I was battling identity struggles and I was paranoid I’d never work again, because I’d be written off as just a mum. So when Jeremy Vine invited me back on his show, I jumped at the chance! It was a chance to still be me, not Ashley the mum, just Ashley. But the problem was the logistics as Alfie was only six-month-old, he was still breastfeeding and wouldn’t take a bottle. So Tommy took a day’s holiday and said he would sit with Alfie in the green room, provided he wouldn’t have to be on camera. He wanted to support my career. But I was still scared that Alf would need me as he was a big baby and fed regularly, plus it had been lockdown, so I’d never really been away from him. The production team were amazing and they promised me if he needed me, we’d make it work. Things were going smoothly until Alf had a huge poo explosion all over my dress moments before I went live! Jeremy asked if we could introduce him to everyone on air, and whilst we were talking, Alf started to want to feed. At first, I panicked, but then my maternal instinct kicked in, and I thought his hunger was more important than anything else. Initially, I was gutted that it had happened as I wanted to be Ashley the professional, not Ashley the mum, and now I was being Ashley the mum on TV. I came off the show to so many comments about how I was attention-seeking, and it struck me as strange that I’d want attention, or that it was even worthy of something you do for attention. Feeding a baby should be unremarkable. But then I realised that’s why it’s so important to normalise breastfeeding, to fight against the hypersexualisation of boobs, and the stigma of feeding a baby in public, and to show the reality of juggling motherhood and a career. And now I’m actually really proud to have breastfed on TV!”

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Sitting Is The New Smoking

Putting aside that perhaps I was a bit of a dinosaur, research has shown that working from home offers several health benefits, which can positively impact both physical and mental well-being.

These include: –

The potential for better nutrition intake

Improved sleep

Increased physical activity (hmmm I’m not so sure about this)

A comfortable work environment

Reduced stress due to less commute time

Better work-life balance

Increased productivity

More family time

Ability to take breaks as needed

Decreased social anxiety

As is often the case however, there is also counter research that has stated that whilst working from home does offer many benefits, it can also present several challenges and potential negative effects on both physical and mental health.

Some of these include:

An increased sedentary lifestyle (let’s talk a little more about this)

Poor ergonomics (and this!)

Increased screen time leading to digital eye strain/computer vision syndrome, headaches, blurred vision, and dry eyes

Isolation and loneliness

Stress and burnout

Presenteeism

Distractions and lack of focus

Reduced social interaction

Communication challenges

Technology issues

Lack of access to resources

Potential for decreased professional development

I must state that the purpose of this article is not to sway opinion on whether I believe that working from home is a good or bad thing or should or shouldn’t happen. I am also as always certainly not here to judge.

What I do personally believe (whether this is caused by increased working from home or not) is that quite simply we are moving less than we ever have, and spending more time sat on our lovely backsides than we also ever have.  Both our movement volume and movement quality are at an all-time low. When given the choice whether to jump in a lift or on an escalator or take the stairs, data from the USA states that only 2% of people will take the stairs (Easter., 2021).  This is backed by further research showing that we exercise 14 x less than our ancestors – who moved fast for 2 hours daily (O’Keefe et al., 2010).  For context, we’re living in a world where some people don’t even go to collect their take aways anymore!!  It’s a slippery slope, it’s only getting worse, and this is causing major problems to both our physical and mental health.  So much so, that statistically, the links to long-term sitting down and poor health issues show that:

SITTING IS THE NEW SMOKING.

Yes, you read that right.

And that is frightening.

Long-term sitting down is now linked to more chronic illness and ill health such as heart disease, lung disease, diabetes etc than smoking is.

• People who spend more than 6 hours per day sitting with low levels of physical activity have a 71% increase in mortality rate.

• Sitting for more than 7 hours daily increases the risk of depression by 47% compared to those who only sit for 4 hours a day or less.

(Chau et al., 2013)

• A sedentary lifestyle can increase the risk of developing Alzheimer’s by up to 12 times.

(Yan et al., 2020)

And I could carry on.

Whether you like it or not, or even realise it or not, long-term sitting down is destroying your health, is ruining your body, and the decline is frightening and dramatic especially as each year passes by. 

With reduced physical mobility you get higher rates of disease, as well as increases in disability, hospitalization, and an early visit to your maker – the data shows that society is literally sitting itself to death!!!

From a musculoskeletal perspective, the damage is extremely evident.  Recent studies show that we have less mobility and range of motion in our joints than we ever have, and this is playing havoc and causing increased pain in our back, hips, shoulders and knee joints.  It’s causing increased sarcopenia (muscle and strength loss), and again it only gets worse with age. 

Poor levels of mobility are also directly linked to low levels of performance.  With poor mobility, you will perform worse in the gym, in your sports, and in the workplace.  Your body will overwork potentially leading to fatigue and or injury.  Basically put, in every area, you will have a poorer quality of life.

Now I’m sorry to be all doom and gloom.

But we must accept that this part of our lifestyle is doing us no favours at all.  The good news, however, is that you can do something about it, and you must start getting yourself moving more today to undo this. 

Because, as the saying goes: –

Movement is medicine.

I can testify to this as I have personal experience of the damage that too much sitting and a lack of the correct and specific movements each day can cause. This is not because of the thousands of clients I have worked with, from beginner right through to elite athlete.  This is a journey I am all too familiar with.  You see, due to Covid-19 a lot more of my work and daily life had transferred to Zoom and being sat on my laptop.  Meetings and seminars that were in person went virtual, face to face coaching sessions where I would often take clients walking and in the outdoors were exchanged for the screen, and I spent far more time sitting down than I ever had.  After ignoring some warning signs, I developed a pretty serious injury in my lower back and was diagnosed that I had ‘slipped a disc’.

I don’t mind telling you, it was absolute agony.

Basic functions such as walking a few steps, tying my shoelaces, picking my bag up off the floor and even going to the toilet (!!!) were almost impossible.  They were extremely painful if nothing else.  Whilst of course these things can occasionally happen, I’d love to tell you that my injury and subsequent severe pain couldn’t have been avoided, but it’s likely that it could.  You see I was aware that my posture and overall mobility had been poor for a number of years, and I was also aware that this was causing me discomfort at times in my life.  But it ‘wasn’t too bad’, so if I’m honest, I ignored it. 

Slowly and steadily, I had developed what is known as ‘Lower Crossed Syndrome’.   This presents as having an anterior (forward) pelvic tilt, tightness in the hip flexors, and weakness in the gluteal muscles (Sahu & Phansopkar., 2021). I suppose you could say that my arch in my back was noticeable, and my posture looked a little bit like a duck!!  And you guessed it, this condition is caused by inactivity, too much sitting down, and is linked and known to cause pain in a variety of areas, especially chronic and intense pain in the lower back!  Sadly, the statistics show that Lower Crossed Syndrome, the symptoms of this, the pain especially in the lower back, and the posture this makes your body look like (duck posture) may be familiar to some of you?

So, what must you do about it??

A quick Google search about tips to counterbalance increased inactivity and too much sitting down will tell you to:

• Stay active
• Maintain a routine
• Eat healthy
• Get your 10,000 steps in each day etc.

And all of that is absolutely correct.  But you must go further and focus on specific work to improve your mobility, posture, and undo the effects of inactivity and long-term sitting. This work can be a little painful,** it can most certainly be boring, but you must make it a priority and do it every single day.  It’s also likely that you will do this work for the rest of your life.

You should work on all joints and muscles within your body, however a saying I came across many years ago is that “the hips are the bully of the body” and this is true with your mobility.  You must target the hips, in particularly the psoas major (known as hip flexors) and work on them directly.  When tightened the psoas muscles begin to “bully” other areas of the body.  The pelvis tilts forwards, your core strength is reduced, your glute strength is reduced, the discs in the lower back are compressed amongst other things, and the journey towards being in pain begins.

Stretching alone will not do the trick to fix you.  You must attend and perform Pilates based exercises, and include strengthening exercises such as glute bridges, with rear elevated split squats being the leading exercise to reverse these negative effects.  Remember, you should perform these under supervision if you have not done them previously.

The final challenge is your focusing on your mindset.  Being in pain is debilitating and can affect your mood, and you must be aware of this.  Again, remember that movement is medicine.  Make a commitment to start and end your day with some mobility and strength-based work, and you will soon start to feel much better both physically and mentally.  I’ve already mentioned that the corrective movements and exercises can be boring and will often provide very minimal instant reward or muscular feedback (they often hurt, and you don’t always get that ‘pump’ or training high).  Being aware of this will help.  Instead of seeking the short-term pleasure ‘feeling’ associated with training, commit to a personal code of completing your mobility and postural based exercises every day whether you feel like it or not.  Focus on the long-term gains, instead of the short-term quick fixes and commit to intentional and correctional movements every day.

Get out of the chair, and off the sofa. Mobilise the tight areas in your body and strengthen the weaker areas.  Every day, prioritise the micro tasks that are so effective such as sitting on the floor, on an exercise ball, on in a deep squat position as often as you can. 

Be mindful of the stories you tell yourself, about yourself. You are not lacking in mobility or strength because of age, or because you are ‘getting older’.  It is not a done deal, and it is not too late.  Your body is tight, weak and in pain because you are not doing enough of what your body is designed to do, and that is purposeful and intentional movement each and every day.

It’s time to take responsibility for this and it’s time to change. 

So that with the gift of age, you will not just ‘cope’ or survive, but instead, physically and mentally, you will thrive.

Best wishes.

Ric

 *Always consult a qualified physician or doctor before participating in any form of physical activity.

MORE FROM BROOD:

Jorgie Porter, Ollie Piotrowski and their son Forest. Image by Tom Pitfield for BROOD Magazine Limited © Jorgie Hair Wrap: Hair Made Easi

Jorgie Porter and Ollie Piotrowski. Image by Tom Pitfield for BROOD Magazine Limited ©

One of the biggest topics of discussion for Jorgie & Ollie whilst recording Drama Queens centred around childcare for Forest and the importance of each of their individual careers – the type of conversation that all BROOD readers understand all too well. Following the announcement that Jorgie and Ollie will be adding a new addition to their brood later this year, we sat down with them to hear how they currently manage the struggle of the juggle and how they each got to where they are today. 

Alfie was at school when we came to do the photoshoot at the couple’s stunning family home, and in true BROOD style little Forest fell asleep just as we started taking the pictures, so after Ollie put down Forest for a much-needed nap, and Jorgie had a quick pregnancy snack, we sat down with the inspiring and down to earth couple to chat all things career and parenthood. 

What advice would you give to fellow parents who are chasing their career dreams whilst also juggling parenthood?

Ollie – “Compromise, you’ve got to find a way to compromise.”

Jorgie – “Yeah, Ollie is really good at stuff like this. He always seems to know when I need rest, I think because when you’re pregnant and growing a baby, whilst looking after a baby you can’t do it all and end up moaning and getting emotional, but Ollie realises that I just need a rest.”

Ollie – “Yeah nothing is perfect, so you’ve to try and focus on your career whilst also trying to make the most of bringing up your kids. It is difficult, but it is achievable.”

Jorgie – “Yeah, what you’re really good at is coming home, and switching off and being a Dad, and actually giving that time to the children.”

Is that something you find easy to do though, as it’s not easy to switch off when you run a business and you run a few businesses? 

Ollie – “No, secretly it’s difficult to switch off but your kids are the best things in the world aren’t they so that overrides any feeling of stress…and then as soon as they go to bed the stress comes back!” [We all laugh] “It’s the only thing that I would say distracts me from the stresses that can come from running a business”

 What has been your career highlight to date?

Jorgie – “I’ve been so lucky to do so many incredible things, meet so many amazing people on loads of jobs. But I’d have to say that because when I was growing up as a kid, like a young little ballerina wannabe, aspirational sort of everything I wanted to be was a ballet dancer on a stage and I managed to do ballet dancing on West End stage in Fame the Musical and that I think has always been a lifelong dream as a child and I sort of look back at myself as a kid going, aww she’d be really proud of me right now.”

Ollie – “If I’m honest, I think it’s massively underrated to just celebrate growth. I am proud to have a group of companies that to date have stood the test of time, and have lasted over ten years – We’ve navigated through some tough times – Brexit, COVID, inflation and a recession!”

What was the most challenging time in your life, and how did you navigate your work life at that time?

Ollie – “In the early days of Pinnacle after a long battle I lost my best friend, Josh, to cancer –  I channelled my grief into a way to keep pushing forward as I knew he was my number one supporter. Josh, was the only one who supported me in the concept of setting up the investment and developing the company when everyone else was telling me to work for a company. I channelled my grief into a way to keep pushing forward as I knew he was my number one supporter. At the same time, I had just had my first child and was a single parent from birth with Alfie. This in itself was a super difficult balancing act! To this day if I think of anything Pinnacle related it brings me back to Josh.”

Jorgie – “I think for me, it was when I moved to America. I was so brave and so sort of strong, I think going out there on my own. I lived there for four years back and forth, and I just did everything I needed to do, except the end goal which was to get a job. The only thing I needed to do was work and it didn’t happen. It was such hard work and I really struggled. Then I realised that actually everything I needed and everything I want is back in England. I could have kept trying in America and carrying on, but I just think I would have really, really struggled a lot and so I think that was really challenging and also I was just sort of living off my savings and then I kind of had to come back and I was able to then come back to Hollyoaks which was really really good and I’m just so grateful that I was able to come back to work after that.

So really I didn’t have a work life when I lived in America, I just kind of just spent money like it was Gonna be there and it wasn’t and so I think that was when I was like, oh right This is this way. I’ve got to really come back and work hard and save money again, and that’s what I had to do.”

What is your favourite thing about being a parent?

Ollie – “No matter what is going on in the outside world or what has happened both good or bad in business your children don’t really care. You close the door and it’s a feeling of pure love. They just want you as their Daddy to play, cuddle, be silly and feed them!”

Jorgie – “I actually didn’t think being a parent would be this good. I genuinely, you just get, like when you see him just flourish a bit or do something new or he’ll learn a new word or all of a sudden he’ll do something and you’ll be like where have you learnt that from? It’s like the biggest shock and the biggest surprise and also that when he’s so happy doing something you get really happy. I think, honestly I am so shocked every day how much I love it about being a parent. I am obsessed with Forest. I actually can’t wait for this other baby to come into our life and I think, I think yeah it’s just the surprises that come with it. I even don’t mind waking up early, which I absolutely can’t do, but when he wakes up laughing and he’s saying Mummy I think aww okay yeah. So he’s changed my life a lot and the little things I do and also just like putting a little human being first before you is kind of like new and actually really just gives you that, I don’t know it gives you that sort of need for living, like you kind of now have a different like reason to live. It sounds deep doesn’t it when you ask these questions but it really is truly that awesome and that great.”

Do you hope that watching you both follow your career dreams will inspire your children to do the same?

Ollie – “Both me and Jorgie left home very young. 16, for me! So I want them to feel they can aspire to be anything. I think the world is programmed to put people in boxes and follow the narrative – education until 18/uni or work/house/mortgage/car/debt/pension…… I want my children to understand that they can create their own narrative and have a safe home to build the foundations from if they need.”

Jorgie – “Yeah, I really really do hope that this is a thing, I’ve always worked since I was a kid like I think from the age of 14 I was working in the hairdressers I just hope that our kids will be like right we need to work in order to sort of you know get somewhere I also hope that they see that we enjoy work I want them to have a job where they can go I’ll actually I actually like going to work and I hope that you know we give that inspiration of working hard you then have the side of you can have a great life so I yeah I really do think it’s important that they will sort of see how important work is but also to enjoy it is my sort of thing is because I laugh every day at work and so I hope they do too.”

Have you ever had a BROOD moment where work and parenthood collide?

Ollie – “A BROOD moment we had was when we went to Spain, and we were only going for 48 hours as Jorge was doing some work and Forest got really ill and we couldn’t get home, but Jorgie was filming the next day.” 

Jorgie “ Oh yeah, we couldn’t have taken him on the plane he was literally going through 7-8 nappies an hour! It was the poorliest he’s ever been, but I had work the next day and it’s one of those things where you have to phone work and tell them and I wanted to film it to show them, to prove that it was actually happening, because you just think no one will ever get it! So we had to just make a decision not to get on the flight.” 

Ollie – “We were full of anxiety, thinking we’ve got to get on a plane and he’s screaming and you know what everyone is like on a plane.”

Jorgie – “Yeah, he still wasn’t happy the next day, but there was no way we could get on that first plane!” 

Ollie – “Another one is when we went out shopping for the first time after he was born, and we went to Selfridges and he had that poonami!”    

Jorgie – “Oh the Poonami! That was definitely one of those things that happen that nobody warns you about! [She laughs] He needed feeding so I took him to the toilet, and Ollie was outside somewhere, and I decided to change his nappy…and he just started pooing everywhere, but then because he was so hungry he needed feeding, so I just fed him without a nappy on and he just poonamied down my tights, my clothes, everywhere! And I was trying to phone Ollie…” 

Ollie – “But she had no signal, so I was thinking what the hell is she doing inside this bathroom! [We all laugh] I felt like I looked really weird lingering around outside the toilets.”

Jorgie – “And I was inside laughing hysterically – because what can you do! [We continue laughing] 

Ollie – “Yeah, our first time out shopping with him” 

Jorgie – “I don’t even know if we had another outfit for him!” 

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