LOSS AFTER LOVE; CHALLENGES DURING THE FESTIVE PERIOD

LOSS AFTER LOVE; CHALLENGES DURING THE FESTIVE PERIOD

LOSS AFTER LOVE; CHALLENGES DURING THE FESTIVE PERIOD

Loss and grief is something that every single human being will experience at some time in their lives, and so we are never alone in this, however, despite this, it can still feel like a very lonely and overwhelming experience when we are in it. Grief can often feel more difficult at certain times of the year, for example, when there is often more talk around family and loved ones getting together to celebrate, and those that are now missing from our lives are remembered, we may find ourselves feeling sad and overwhelmed, wishing they were still with us.

There is no quick fix where grief or loss are concerned, and there isn’t an answer or a strategy on how to cope, but there are certainly some things that we can consider at the most challenging of times.

Patience is one of the main gifts you can give yourself during these times. I have often heard people saying things like, ‘I thought it would feel easier by now’ or ‘It’s been so long I should be feeling different by now’ and many other versions of this. There are no ‘should’ and ‘should not’s’ when it comes to grief. There also isn’t a timeline. It takes as long as it takes for the intensity of feelings to ease, and these feelings can also come in waves, particularly as I already mentioned, around the festive season, birthdays and anniversaries and so on.

Be kind and compassionate with yourself. Grieving doesn’t have a start and an end date, we are not waiting until it just disappears and then we won’t feel loss or pain anymore. Therefore when it does feel particularly overwhelming, notice how you talk to yourself, avoid judgment and criticism and show yourself love and compassion, especially at the times you need it most.

Understanding and awareness is also key. There are various stages of grief we can go through such as denial, anger, depression, but these are not linear stages and so you may find that you dip in and out of the stages, and this is perfectly OK. It can be comforting to know that everything you are experiencing is normal and to be expected. Although grief is something we all experience, how we deal with it and manage it doesn’t need to be the same for everyone. Follow your own gut instinct and give yourself permission to grieve YOUR way.

If you are facing the festive season and feeling like you are dreading this time and want it to be over with quickly due to feeling the sad loss of a loved one, then it’s important to consider lowering your expectations of yourself and your feelings. It’s OK if you don’t want to socialise much. It’s Ok if you don’t want to decorate your home. It’s OK if you want to spend time alone. Equally it’s also OK if you still want to celebrate and make the most of the time you have with friends and family, it’s OK if you want to decorate your home more than ever before!  We are still OK to enjoy our time and socialise when we are grieving too. We can experience the whole range of emotions in equal measures, and there is no need to feel guilty about that as feelings are not fixed, they ebb and flow naturally, and the less we resist all of them, the more peace we will feel in our loves day to day.

Overall, it’s really about you seeking comfort in people and things or ways that make you feel more at ease, and that will vary for everyone. From myself and the team at Brood, for anyone feeling grief, sadness or loss, we are sending you lots of love. I wanted to finish with a little quote that gave me comfort when I lost very special people in my life over the years.

“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”. Alfred Lord Tennyson

Article by Sarie Taylor

For further help, contact Sarie Taylor direct: sarie@sarietaylor.com or you can call Samaritans on 116 123

Sarie Taylor Counsellor and Psychotherapist
Sarie Taylor resident pyscotherapist

Auntie Cath cooks shredded chicken thai salad

This month Auntie Cath (Catherine Tyldesley) shares her recipe for Shredded Chicken Thai Salad.

CHRISTMAS DAY RECIPES – SIMON WOOD

The Turkey Ingredients Carrots  Celery  Garlic 4 Large Potato’s 2 Large Onions Clementine Streaky Bacon Sage, Rosemary & Thyme The Method If you have stuffed the Turkey you will need to remember to Weigh it again and calculate the cooking time (about 20 minutes...

What others think of us is actually none of our business…

What others think of us is actually none of our business…This is something that I continually remind myself and my clients of. We can spend so much of our time and energy on worrying about other peoples opinions, as well as the general opinions and expectations of...

HEALTHY HALLOWEEN PLATTER AND OCTOBER WELLNESS BY KATE DEVINE

instagramHealthy Halloween platter and October Wellness  October, the month of spookiness and seasonal changes. I can’t tell you how many time I’ve discussed the weather with clients over the past month. A strange sentence to begin with, I know, but bear with… There’s...

SIMON WOOD’s WEEKEND FAKE-AWAY: Naantastic’ Rarebit with Bombay Taters & Curry Sauces

SIMON WOOD'S FAKEAWAYBY SIMON WOOD OF WOOD MANCHESTER AND WoodKraft Cheltenham. IMAGES © TOM PITPIELD FOR BROOD MAGAZINEThere’s no harm in having a little bit of a treat now and then, what’s that saying? ‘Everything in Moderation, including moderation.’ Well, I’m no...

Cath Tyldesley & Tom Pitfield share the news of Cath’s incredible career opportunity overseas that will leave Tom ‘holding the baby’.

© BROOD MAGAZINE. OUR CO-FOUNDER TOM PITFIELD, HIS WIFE, ACTRESS CATHERINE TYLDESLEY & THEIR SON ALFIE & DAUGHTER IRIS  “Mum guilt never gets any easier!” Only last week our co-founder Tom Pitfield, and his wife, a successful and widely respected actress,...

Sarie Taylor: Overwhelm

Feeling overwhelmed? Our resident Psychotherapist gives us some tips to reduce our stress and anxiety when it comes to a parent juggling work and family life.

Sarie Taylor – Coach and mum of two

SUCCESSFUL MUMPRENEUR SARIE TAYLOR, IS A PARENT TO A 15 YEAR OLD WITH ANOTHER ON THE WAY

Kate’s Leftover Easter Chocolate Smash!

I just wanted to share a little recipe that I’ve made with my kids, to get rid of the left over Easter egg chocolate that sits in the cupboard calling your name every time you walk past! It’s a chocolate bark smash full of lots of healthy ingredients that the kids will love to add along the way.

Kate’s Summer Seasonal foods and her easy Jersey Royal New Potato Salad with Pesto, Peas and Broccoli recipe

instagramSUMMER SEASONAL FOODS I don’t know about you guys but I’m so ready for the summer! With the change in season happening this month, it got me thinking about seasonal foods. There are many benefits to choosing foods that are in season… Becoming at one with...

LOSS AFTER LOVE; CHALLENGES DURING THE FESTIVE PERIOD

LOSS AFTER LOVE; CHALLENGES DURING THE FESTIVE PERIODLoss and grief is something that every single human being will experience at some time in their lives, and so we are never alone in this, however, despite this, it can still feel like a very lonely and overwhelming...

REMIND YOURSELF WHAT MATTERS BY ASHLEIGH GUTHRIE

© BROOD MAGAZINERemind Yourself of What Matters As I sit here and breathe deeply, sipping my tea, eating a morning pastry, I am reminded of the importance of taking time to pause. Questions swirling through my mind, “Who are you beneath the fast paced ‘doingness’ of...

Bank Holiday Baking with Kate Devine

Sticky BB Brownies – packed full of polyphenols and prebiotics to help support the gut

Salmon and Chorizo Kebabs with a Tamari Glaze by Kate devine

instagramLet's TALK HOLIDAY AND EXERCISE I’m lucky enough to be writing this months article while still on my holiday in Spain. I get asked a lot by clients and friends about how to stay healthy but still enjoy yourself while away; and to avoid the...

Amy Hughes was the first woman to run 53 Marathons in 53 days…But was that as much of a challenge as being a mum in business!

AMY HUGHES AND HER DAUGHER. © TOM PITFIELD PHOTOGRAPHY "...you know THAT you’re working so hard to financially support them, but you just feel really bad when you’re working too much." As the first woman to run 53 Marathons in 53 days, inspiring mum of one Amy Hughes...

4 Simple ways to reset when you’re feeling burnt out and overwhelmed

ASHLEIGH GUTHRIE. IMAGE © TOM PITFIELD PHOTOGRAPHYONE OF MY FAVOURITE PIECES OF ADVICE FOR CREATIVE PRODUCTIVITY IS, “IF YOUR MIND IS EMPTY READ, IF YOUR MIND IS FULL WRITE.”  KNOWING WHEN TO REST AND WHEN TO ACT THROUGHOUT THE DIFFERENT CYCLES OF THE MONTH AND...

Kate’s healthy ice cream and fruit popsicles

instagramSummer is officially here…..! Schools are winding down, holidays are beginning to be had, and life feels kinda back to normal post Covid. But, the question that I think many parents will face - I know I’m slightly concerned about this - is what on earth are...

Ashleigh Guthrie

ASHLEIGH GUTHRIE. IMAGE © TOM PITFIELD PHOTOGRAPHYAshleigh Guthrie is a spiritual mentor, women’s circle facilitator, sound healer and trauma informed child hypnotherapist – trained by teachers from different traditions all over the world. Ashleigh is BROOD Magazine’s...

How children can enrich your spiritual path

How children can enrich your spiritual path.The beginning of my spiritual journey was one spent in solitude, I loved creating my own temple space within my living room, I meditated within the forest at the back of my home, I travelled globally...

Auntie Cath Cooks

Cath’s other huge passion in life is Food! After study nutrition on maternity leave with her first child- Caths enthusiasm for food grew. Especially nutritious, budget friendly, tasty family meals. We’re thrilled to bits to have Cath join us and share her knowledge and passion! You’re in for a treat with Auntie Caths recipes!

 KEEP UP TO DATE WITH BROOD:

* indicates required
Please select all the ways you would like to hear from Brood Magazine:
You can unsubscribe at any time by clicking the link in the footer of our emails. For information about our privacy practices, please visit our website.
We use Mailchimp as our marketing platform. By clicking below to subscribe, you acknowledge that your information will be transferred to Mailchimp for processing. Learn more about Mailchimp's privacy practices here.

Related Articles